Cancer Truth Note: #48
Age, race, physical size, and many other factors that have little to do with cancer, prevent us from being heard and properly diagnosed in a timely manner.
Let’s face it, this is true for way more than a cancer diagnosis. We are not always seen or heard. Sometimes we feel dismissed. Sometimes doctors or even salespeople speak to our significant other even though they are discussing a condition or purchase where the choices are ours not someone else’s.
I was buying a car a long while back. I thought I was going to get a Jetta. I had done my research and thought I was going in as a formality to test drive and leave with a new car. The salesman kept talking to my then boyfriend. Who in response each time this happened said “You better talk to her; she is the one with the check book.” Then the salesman proceeded to tell me I did not want what I wanted. When I asked to drive the new model year jetta, he brought out last year’s model passat. Ummmmm WTF?
He called me a week later, the only salesman I saw that day to follow up with me and I visited four different dealerships. Ordinarily this would have been appreciated except he didn’t talk to me or listen to what I wanted when I was in front of him, I wasn’t really sure why he was following up. He asked if I had made a decision. I told him, I had not. However, I would definitely not be buying the car from him. He asked why. I said I was ready to buy the car from you, but you argued with me about what I wanted and then tried to sell me a different model you needed to sell, not what I wanted to buy.
Being kind, yet honest is another way to advocate for yourself. Then make it clear they can talk to you or you can go elsewhere.
I am curious what you would have done if you did your research and went to buy a car and were told you wanted something different?
If you are discussing surgical approaches with a doctor and cannot get answers to your questions why wouldn’t you get a second opinion?
Checkout the Podcast
Cancer Truth Note: #297 Using negative words to describe your body brings you down. Bodies are amazing things. Focus on the good your body has done for you today. See how your mood and perspective shift. I often hear people use really harsh language when they talk...
Cancer Truth Note: #296 Being productive is more than moving the big rocks. It is walking the dog, brushing the cat, doing one load of laundry, spending time reading a book or working on a project for fun, or taking a nap when you need rest. A cancer diagnosis often...
Cancer Truth Note: #295 Are you feeling unproductive and negative about it? Gratitude for the little things can flip the script on our perpetually over-packed lives. This is a big one. For all the overachievers out there, slowing down during treatment and in the...